Loyal reader KingBill emailed me this story (you know when the subject line of an email is: “I just threw up in my mouth a little” its gonna be a good one), but I’m still not sure I get it.

Apparently, Star Jones and Dwayne Wade are dating. I don’t know if it’s true or not, as the Detroit Free Press article simply has a bullet point saying:

• Star Jones, reportedly dating Miami Heat star Dwyane Wade, has filed for a divorce from her husband of about three years, Al Reynolds.

Keep in mind, they put this at the bottom of the page, with no context or sources (Hey! Just like us!).

So basically, this is going out with this. Again, this and this have made out and probably had sex. Also, keep in mind that this used to be this before this.

Now, I think I have a good viewpoint to comment on this. Like Dwayne Wade I really, really want to be am famously wealthy and a former member of People’s 50 Most Beautiful People.

People have a hard time understanding this relationship, but I mean, have you ever fucked a fat/ugly chick? They’re so damn grateful to be doing someone they’re attracted to, as opposed to the night watchmen at a Kinko’s, that they will do literally anything. I can just imagine the depraved shit they do.

Sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little. 

but who’s the biggest winner here? Al Reynolds. He went from “that guy who banged that annoying woman who’s famous for nobody knows why and then married her for her money” to “that guy who got half of a fat woman’s money, and now Dwayne Wade is taking his sloppy seconds.”

Obama – you’ve found your VP.